Changing

My first blog...I never know how to start these things.  I am not eloquent in my writing skills and I am sure some of my "country" roots will shine through in my grammar.  So here goes, from my heart spilling onto this screen.

God truly amazes me.  I cannot tell you the last time that I have cried.  When I say cried, I mean a true heart wrenching cry.  I shed a few tears for the humane society commercial EVERY time I see it but I have not had a good sit down bawl your eyes out cry in .....years. 

Until now.  

My life is wonderful.  I have a loving, hard working, true man of God, handsome husband, a beautiful, full of life, spunky, independent 10 month old daughter, and a very loyal chihuahua (not yappy either).  We are blessed day in and day out.  

Recently my husband made a career change.  He has been given the awesome gift of reaching people through song(s).  He is an amazing singer.  When I first met my husband in 2000, he was singing good ol' country music.  He pursued this career path for more than 10 years.  He would sing both country and gospel and was always struggling inside on which direction God wanted him to go.  In January, he made the decision to surrender to full time Christian music ministry.  God immediately opened doors for him.  He is now the new lead singer for a Christian trio called Beyond the Ashes.  www.myspace.com/beyondtheashesonline.  Through his career change, the Lord has been softly speaking to me.  My personality does not take authority well, so I know He knows how to get me to listen.  Ha!  I have been struggling with my heart being so cold to life.  I know that through my own life's struggles that I have become a hardened person.  My husband's heart is so pure and loving, while mine can be more on the guarded side.  I have many walls built and I don't know if anyone has ever taken them all down.  One of my constant prayers is that God will tear down my walls and USE me.  I am scared because I can feel this transformation...this growth.  I do not like being vulnerable but it is through weakness that His power works best.  (2 Corinthians 12:9)  

As silly as this may sound, I have a twitter account.  I follow my husband's group and a few others.  The others are friends or friends of friends that have inspired me.  One is Angie Smith.  She is an amazing Godly woman.  When I say amazing....I mean the most amazing person that I have ever met.  During this past week she has been posting prayer requests as her facebook status.  I read most of them and usually say a quick prayer and move along with my day.  Today after reading several posts of hers, I became very curious about this story.  The Lord kept pulling on my heart strings to dig deeper and find out what was going on.  My goodness!  It is an amazing story that I could not possibly re-tell here.  www.mycharmingkids.net  Bottom line:  Stellan is a 5 month old baby boy that was not supposed to even live to see his birth.  He has SVT (heart beats way too FAST).  The doctors cannot seem to get it under control with medication and he is undergoing heart ablation surgery Tuesday.  You can follow his mom on twitter http://twitter.com/mckmama  Everything about this story amazes me.  God is so AWESOME!!!  Stellan is a fighter.  Now I am asking you to help fight for him!  Pray for the doctors, the nurses, Stellan, his family...every one involved with his surgery Tuesday.  My heart is so heavy.  

I am off to get some rest....1:30am now and I do have to work tomorrow. TGIF!

God bless,

Doni